Ten Years Later: A Look at Columbine

Well, here we are. Ten years to the day since that horrific day in Littleton, Colorado. A day that forever changed history in the world of Peer Abuse and bullying. It is a day that is hard to comprehend and a day that has left many to speculate. Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris came to Columbine High School and created what is the greatest school massacre in US History. They killed 12 students, wounded 23 others then killed themselves. After this event, we all started to speculate as to why this happened and heard reasons from Harris being a psychopath, a love of violence, they were bullied and isolated and of course video games. Lets not forget the media, parenting skills and the fact they did not know Jesus. All could be a reason for what happened and make for a good argument in all of this. All could have factored into it. I have seen homemade videos they made while planning this event as they came out later in the news. In the videos, they share a love of violence, ground zero which was the school and the jocks and others who they believed acted superior to them. I saw a lot of anger, frustration and cries for help in the videos. Two bright young men who could have had bright futures but instead felt the world let them down. Well guess what? The world did fail them and in my opinion, we still do.

Lets face it folks. These boys were bullied and this came out in a loud manner soon after the fact. I have heard many stories about the abuse they suffered at school. People started listening and paying attention and this gave a whole new meaning to bullying. It jumpstarted many programs, books, websites and experts coming out of the wood work. Then people explored other factors like the fact that Eric was homicidal, they played too many video games and were just plain evil. One thing that I have seen for the zillionth time is societies need to once again excuse this problem. No, it was not the bullying at all! The videos say it all and these boys were homicidal and just plain bad. Yes, have heard it all ad nauseam. It makes me sick to be honest. Were these so called people actually students at Columbine when this occurred? Were they tight with Dylan, Eric or their families? The initial feedback led us all back to the fact that they were bullied and in large doses. So why try and excuse this once again? Where do investigators go to find answers? They go to the source. The source was the school and the feedback given was the boys were bullied. Who gave the information? People at the school. Think about it, folks.

On this day, I pose questions to those who are reading this. If these boys were not bullied then why was ground zero the school? Why not Target, grocery stores or laundromats? A church, playground or the local mall? The local hangout for the kids in Littleton? They could have gone anywhere in the community yet they went to the school. Also, why did they mention jocks and those who they felt wronged them in the videos? Because a video game told them to?

Its been ten years and this event woke society up to the fact that bullying might actually be a problem. Programs are set up, books are written and the mindset is changing. However, we have a way to go in this. This is still not seen as a clinical problem nor is it considered what it really is and that is abuse. Elder Abuse became an issue after Columbine and it is already listed on government forms and that angers me because this is not. On this day, please take a minute and get serious about this! Take a minute to educate someone you know. Help raise awareness and do something kind for someone else. My condolences to all who lost someone in this tragedy. It could have been prevented with a little awareness and education from society. Hopefully the excuses will stop and folks will see this for what it is and that is abuse; Peer Abuse!

Resource Cited:
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/opinion/2009077227_opina19pitts.html

Elizabeth Bennett is the author of Peer Abuse Know More! Bullying From a Psychological Perspective and resides in Los Angeles, California. To learn more, visit http://www.peerabuse.info

Anthony Biggs Jr. Victimized by a Cruel Society

I got an email from my best friend on Saturday. It was a Yahoo story about a young man who committed suicide via a webcam in front of a live, virtual audience. This took place on the site Justin.tv .The way I understand it, this young man was threatening to take his own life and was egged on by other viewers to do so who were watching this take place. A few tried to stop it and contacted the police in his area. However, it was too late. The young man, Abraham Briggs Jr., suffered from bi-polar disorder died from a combination of opiates and benzodiazepines he took for his illness. What sort of a world do we live in where we encourage those who are hurting and are in trouble?
You know, people out there are shocked and appalled by this. Well, I’m not one of them. I have been using the internet for almost 10 years and some of the things I have seen online have been unbelievable. People starting flame wars and trolling chat rooms and communities. There is always some sort of drama somewhere. Then there is the social site problems that are hot beds for gossip, rumors and impersonating or making up monikers to hurt and upset others. My Space and Face book are two of the leading sites for this. I see the callousness people exhibit online towards one another. They waste time and energy fighting and commenting using the most scathing and biting remarks they can find. Plus, while people get their kicks out of breaking each other, I hear the other side of it. The side where people are traumatized by these actions and events. How they are needing therapy to cope with the stress, anxiety and depression that all of this has brought on. So, when I heard of this recent act of bullycide, I was not in the least surprised. Abraham Biggs Sr. was shocked by this behavior as most are but me? No, we have become a callous lot who just do not give a darn about one another at all. Any decency that was once there has left the building.
As I have said many a time, we have to crack down on this cyber bullying problem. Another young life is lost at the hands of tormentors who had fun watching their victim die right in front of their eyes. Why do we continue to stay in the dark? Why are we enabling this? Parents, please talk to your kids and set limits with them on the use of the computer. Educate them on what is right and wrong in this world. I believe many have lost this capacity and everyday, we continue to develop behavior that grows more and more pathological. We are breeding a nation of sociopaths! Let them know that watching someone committing bullycide online is not entertainment. It’s a serious problem and instead of enabling it, teach them to report it. Shouldn’t someone out there give a darn? Is there any human decency left? It can be done if we begin to take this seriously. It only takes a voice and be that voice! My condolences go out to the Biggs family. May your son rest in peace. He was a good kid that fell victim to a cruel society. Nothing more or less.
Resource Cited: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081122/ap_on_re_us/webcam_suicide
Elizabeth Bennett is the author and consultant of Peer Abuse Know More! Bullying From A Psychological Perspective. She resides in Los Angeles, California. To learn more, visit http://www.peerabuse.info .

I was reading an article about two teenage girls from Northern California. They are Emily and Sarah Buder and they wrote a book entitled Letters to a Bullied Girl. The inspiration for this book was a girl in Northern California named Olivia Gardner. Olivia was experiencing severe bullying and peer abuse at the hands of her peers. She suffered indignities such as having her book bag dragged through mud, peers creating an “Olivia Haters” page on the internet and tormenters would always tell her to die. Needless to say, Olivia was suicidal which comes of no surprise to me. When the Buder sisters found out about Olivia and what she was dealing with, they decided to write this book. The project grew as they started to hear from other bullied kids, kids who did bully and felt bad about it, adults who bullied growing up and felt bad and adult survivors who still struggle with the affects of being bullied and abused by their peers.

I commend these two young ladies for reaching out to Olivia who was a complete stranger. Today, it is so rare to see teens have empathy and reach out to others in a compassionate manner. I have the up most respect for these sisters. They probably do not realize how many other kids and teens they helped in their project. Sometimes, hearing these things from a peer rather than an adult or someone in authority can make a greater difference. I hope this book creates a wave with other kids out there and they learn something from it. Kindness can go a long way.

Olivia being suicidal is not uncommon. Many who are bullied and abused by their peers develop depression which leads to suicide eventually. We refer to it as bullycide as this is suicide as a result of peer abuse and bullying. How can we expect someone to grow into a well adjusted and balanced adult when as children, they suffer these indignities and have nobody there to help them? Or, the kids are told to just ignore it and stop taking it personally as it is a fact of life. Schools put so much emphasis on test scores and grades. How can someone excel when they are constantly told they are scum and need to die?

School is starting back in many places. We need to enforce these programs and laws so our children are safe and safe from each other. So they can score high in grades and become productive citizens some day. Emily and Sarah already know kindness and they exercise it. I hope others use these ladies as an example and not think of them as a joke. They both have hearts of gold and a powerful message to share.

Most importantly, I was glad to see the book was dedicated to Corrine Sides. Corrine was an exceptional young lady who did die of bullycide. May her spirit live on through this book. Angels do exist after all.

Resource Cited: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/emily-and-sarah-buder/letters-to-a-bullied-girl_b_116970.html

Elizabeth Bennett is the author of Peer Abuse Know More! Bullying From A Psychological Perspective and resides in Los Angeles, California. To learn more, visit http://www.peerabuse.info .